Mini Musings: You Can’t Stop the Beat

This is a test of the emergency broadcast system. Someone (we won’t name who) is trying to get her shit together so that she can get back into the writing game. It’s been almost a year and a half since she has had any interest in putting her musings to blog. Life marched on and she somehow managed to take not only the road less taken, but the road that most people never even see. She fell into a life of leisure, sloth, and lethargy and finally (finally) decided to get a little bit of work done—here, there, and everywhere. …

Mini Musings: I Did Some Things This Week! (But…)

I finally wrote a blog post. (But I wasn’t terribly clever about it.) I washed the dishes before I put them in the dishwasher. (But I waited as long as I could to see if the hubby would do it first.) I fed the dog. (But he decided to fast that day.) I walked the dog. (But he was mad at me because it wasn’t longer.) I rubbed the dog’s tummy. (But I think I enjoyed it more than he did.) I walked. Inside. (But I never took my hands off the treadmill’s handlebar.) I walked. Outside. (But I only…

Work in Progress…

I don’t like looking in the mirror. Ever. I have memorized when to turn my head just slightly enough to avoid what I see there. I used to have a full-length mirror in the bedroom but it (mysteriously) died a horrific death. I’m not saying that I broke the thing on purpose, but I’m not NOT saying that I did. And I must admit, it was something that really helped ease the anxiety in my life. Not too long ago, I shared with a good friend something that happens to me every time I get up in the morning. I…

Scenes from a Lunch

Scene 1: Driving up the road on her lunch break, our main character is contemplating the easiest way to get to her fast food burrito. She quickly calculates the time savings of taking the street nearest to the high school (even though there’s a lower speed limit) instead of the main thoroughfare (where she will most likely be met with two extra minutes of delay due to street light patterns). Without having consciously made a decision, her muscle reflex jerks the steering wheel to the right and on to the neighborhood street. She is immediately waylaid by a traffic jam…

To Sir, with Love

Dear Sir,  I want to thank you so much for sitting next to us at the end of the bar today. It’s usually not my favorite thing in the world when someone decides to saddle up next to me when there are literally no other people in the room. And I think what made your visit even more special was the fact that you decided to park it specifically two chairs beside me, as opposed to choosing to plop down next to the hubby (who would be happy to chat about absolutely anything). I’m really not sure what vibe I…

I’m Getting Too Old for This Sh*t

When the hubby asked me if I wanted to sneak out on a Sunday night to go to the concert, I was astoundingly, excitedly, extremely meh about the whole idea. It meant leaving the kid alone again (it’s beginning to become a habit and I’m starting to feel a little dirty about it) while we pretended to be cool and hip and ready to party on a whim. But I’ve been in a weird headspace since I’ve retired and I was pretty sure I could muster up the strength to roll off the couch after the sun went down. While…

Have I Become a Successful Coward?

I wish that I could walk across the United States just once. None of that Forrest Gump back and forth bullshit for me–just one good trip to see if I could actually do it. How many miles would I be able to put in before I was ready to call a limo company and grab an air conditioned ride to the nearest town? Would I be able to triumph mind over matter when I inevitably came to the moment where I would systematically tear myself down for being the biggest loser on the planet because I forgot to bring a…

No, You Can’t Make Me Like the Birds

Birds suck.  I don’t have any flowery way to impart that information to you other than being completely honest.  I don’t like them.  Well…maybe just a little bit.  But they’re creepy and annoying and they stink to high hell.  It’s actually kind of funny that I am sitting here even talking about the little devils, but I’ve got an itch in my brain about this and there’s no going on in life if I don’t get it scratched. And it all started because of a lunatic goose that tried to take my hand off at the lake… Every once in…

Mini Musings- Dad’s Not Here and it Sucks

I lost my dad. He died on New Year’s Eve. I miss him every day. It happened so very fast. I can still hear his voice. I miss him always trying to feed me. I wish we could just sit and talk about anything–even if it means he ends up being right. I keep expecting him to get out of his chair and give me a kiss every time I go to the house. I wish I could have known him when he was younger. I wish I appreciated him more when I was growing up. I wish he would…

My, My, My, My Corona: Can I Have My Brain Back?

I’m fine. I’m just fine.  Lying in bed before starting the day:  I want to write. I want to be known. I want to be creative. I want to share. I want to love. I want to bond. Taking a shower: But I don’t want to spend time writing. I don’t like people to look at me. Being creative is difficult. I don’t like it when I share something and people don’t like it. I am too selfish to love fully. I like it when I get to be by myself. Cleaning the restroom for the five millionth time: I…